I’ve never been much for dressing up, especially to meet a man who wears purple suits and clown makeup. My face was never hidden behind make-up or a mask. I knew what I was risking going into Arkham. I was risking my freedom, possibly my sanity going to meet a man who definitely wants to kill me. Walking down those brightly lit halls I passed by those locked doors ignoring the patients looking back at me. “Doctor Gray” one of the guards said motioning me to a door. Room 666. Oh the Irony, some say the Jokers the devil. I don’t believe that. “Well. What are you waiting for? Let me in” The guard entered a code in the door and I slid my slid in the slot and entered the room. The Joker sat on his bed mumbling things, laughing to himself. “Joker?” I asked . His head snapped up, and his eyes traveled over me, his mouth curving into a small smile. His makeup was a mess, and his hair was greasy, obviously showers were optional to him. He looked intimidating in pictures, but this man was a type of beauty to me.

“Well hellooo Dollface.”. I scowled at his nickname and sat on the bed next to him.

“do you know why I’m here?” I asked like he was a child. His eyes were kind of playful, his mouths smile turned to a scowl.

“I know: you’ll tell me what a bad person I am and try to get me to get in touch with my feelings. Doll I’ve done this before but not with anyone like you”

I laughed, which made him smile and make a comment about us being friends.

“Let’s begin. How did you get out of your straitjacket?”

“your not going even to call security on me Dollface?”

“nope”

“I don’t scare you?”

“No one who wears purple pants and a green vest can scare me."

“that’s not very nice.”

“I’m not a nice person”

“Liar”

“not lying”

“sure thing. So how did I get out of the strait jacket you ask? I dislocated my shoulder and when I could move my arms enough, I ripped through the fabric. Ta Da!" he said, reenacting his triumph dramatically.

“that is lovely”

“isn’t it? Maybe I Can show ya sometime”

“we’ll see”

He laughed and started talking about how he likes to kill people, I smiled at him. The Joker and I got along pretty well.

“Tell me about yourself” he demanded

“why do I need to talk about myself if all I got out of you is that you like to kill people”

“because then I know things”

“hmm. Maybe later”

“are you flirting with me?”

“that’s for you to figure out”

“I’m just going to assume you want me”

“sure thing”

“Sarcasm leads to death”

“curiosity killed the cat”

“Touché”
“so what will you tell me about yourself??”

“only if you guess how I got my scars”

“Well have you ever wondered why you mom always told you not to run with scissors, well that’s why. You see one day when the Joker was 12 he was running around with some scissors. He tripped and fell and accidentally stabbed the cat. Now as you can imagine a cat with a pair of scissors is not a happy cat. Fluffy the Wonder Cat, a name given by Jokers mom not him, went nuts and started flipping out. Jokers mom yelled at him and they rushed the cat to the vet. Now I don't know if you have ever been to the vet but it is really boring and as we all know the Joker likes to have fun. He decided to explore a bit and ended up out back shooting caps with Jim the bum. Now what Joker didn't realize is Jim is a really really sore loser and flipped out and accused the Joker of cheating. Now he was cheating but still claimed innocence, which didn't help to calm Jim down. Jim smacked the Joker in the face with a dead hamster from the vets dumpster cracking his front teeth. When his mom found him she was pissed once again because it was now off from the vet to the dentist. Now as the dentist worked on fixing the little guys teeth they learned that the Joker is apparently allergic to latex. The rash spread so horribly bad that he was rushed for emergency surgery. Now the surgeon was shocked when he saw the Joker come in because he knew him well. You see the surgeon lived down the street and had been cruelly pranked by the Joker and wasn't happy with him. Granted you wouldn't be happy too if someone shaved your dog and tattooed a cats face on his back. The surgeon needless to say wasn't gentle. Now when the Joker woke up and took off the bandages he found out that the surgeon had had a friend tattoo a picture of a dog onto his face for revenge. Now he just couldn't have this so he grabbed a knife and cut it off. The scars never did heal right because well lets face it he was a kid and they can't help but pick at scabs. And that is how the Joker got his scars and also why you never run with scissors.”

The joker just stared at me with a ‘WTF’ look on his face. After a few minutes he just started laughing uncontrollably.

“you’ve got an imagination kid, I’ll grant you that”

“my life’s complete. The joker complemented me. “

“do you talk with all your patients like this”

“not all of them”

“just me?”

“if that makes you feel good inside”

“I think anything you’d do to me would make me feel good inside”

“can we be serious now?”

“would it make you happy”

“ecstatic”

“then yes”

“why don’t you give out your real name”

“because I like being mysterious.”

“I bet you do”

“what’s that supposed to mean”

I laughed at him.

“first you insult me now you laugh at me. Kid I like the way you conduct therapy”

“so tell me about your family”

He groaned, “ I’d rather tell you a joke”

“go for it”

“Ahem: Two drums and a cymbal fall on the floor- ba dum, psssht!" I groaned at the stupid joke, but laughed as well.

“you asked for it; wanna hear another one?”

“I wish; but unfortunately I have to go take care of some things. But I did get you something.”

He gasped, "A present? For me? You shouldn't have! It's only our first date." The Joker said bouncing on the bed.

“chill out” I said laughing, “it’s just some make up. Yours is runny and I can almost see your face.”

She pulled out three containers of white, red and black paint and placed it on the bed. The Joker didn't seem to know how to react to the gift and stared at it strangely.

“well it was great talking to ya, but I gotta run”

I gave him a wink and walked out of the room leaving him alone on the bed.